Your Most Memorable Love Relationship

[shadowlunar04]

Time for sharing. I hope bros and sis here can share their most memorable (up to date) love relationship. No fantasy here hor. :D

Let me get the ball rolling.

Well, a lot of people would say first love is always the most memorable but that’s not true in my case. My most memorable love relationship happened when I was in the Poly, 2nd year. I met this JC gal at the bus stop behind the campus, after my lessons in the afternoon. From her uniform, I knew she was from the JC nearby. She was carrying some books and other stuffs (I couldn't remember liao) and I was walking behind her. She was fumbling with the books when some of it dropped on the roadside. She was trying to pick them up with one hand while the other trying to hold on to the remaining books. Upon seeing her in trouble, I walked up and helped her to pick them up. That’s when I noticed her. She looked very sweet and innocent, and said Thank You after I helped her. I offered to my help to her by carrying her books to the bus stop. Since, there was only one bus service; I knew she will be taking the same bus too. So, I continued to carry her books until I reached my stop. I can never forget her looks when she smiled and waved back as the bus left the bus stop. I was totally mesmerized by her. I knew I wanted to see her again, never in my life I wanted to see a girl so much (not even my current CO).

From that day, I started taking buses at the back of the campus and hoping to see her one more time. Weeks passed, heaven answered my calls, and I finally got the chance to see her again. Surprisingly, she still remembered me. We exchanged names and I gave her my pager number and home number (that time, handphones were pretty expensive). After that, we went out a couple of times before we went steady. I spent my most memorable time with her (ok, I shouldn’t go deep into all those mushy mushy stuff). She was from a well to do family. Father passed away when she was young, she has an elder sister and her mom treated me like a son. As the only man around, I always went to her condo to help out on all those men’s chores.

Then things started making a turning point, she graduated from her JC and I graduated from my Poly a few months later. Her mom wanted her to further her studies in Kangarooland and I was waiting to be drafted. I was 19 then and she was 18. She will be going for about 4 years and I will be in the NS for 2 years and 8 months. She asked me to wait for her. But I know I can’t be so selfish because I know she will knows a lot of guys who are better than me. And I don’t want her to miss the better choices of her love life because of our relationship. After a few weeks of deep thoughts, I told her I wanted a breakup but I did not tell her the real reason. I just told her, after my NS, I cannot promise to her that I will be faithful to this relationship when I go out to work. It tore my heart to see her cry when I told her this. The pain was just enormous and I have to steel my heart because it was for her own good (at least, that’s what I thought then). She cried and said she’s not going for her further studies anymore. All I told her was, it’s not worth doing it for a guy like me and she should listens to her mom. Before initiating the breakup, I have told her mom about my decision and she understood why I did that. And she promised she would never tell her daughter the real reason.

Weeks later, she left the country with a broken heart. And I joined the army about the same time. During the NS period, I still go to her house to help out during the weekend. Her sis, eventually, came to know about the real reason and I had to make her promise not to tell. Time passed, I ORDed in ’96 and she came back half a year later. We never reconciled but still remained as friends. We went out a couple of times and she did hint on the get back together thing. I don’t why I didn’t accept it then. Maybe, part of me was still thinking, she will find a better choice. I got married a few years later and we still keep in contact but only through phones only.

During the period, while she was at overseas studies, she did not get into any relationships but I know she had a few guys courting her then (her mom told me that). After she got back, she got into only one relationship and that lasted for less than 6 months. Till now, she’s is still single and devoted most of her time in her work and at home. Sometimes, I wondered, did I hurt her more than doing her good? I don’t know how she will reacts if she knows about the real reason of the breakup. I just hope she will never know. And I never know things will turn out this way; the effect of a single decision can last for years. I just hope she will meet a better man than me because she deserved to be love by one.

[nakamara]

During the period, while she was at overseas studies, she did not get into any relationships but I know she had a few guys courting her then (her mom told me that). After she got back, she got into only one relationship and that lasted for less than 6 months. Till now, she’s is still single and devoted most of her time in her work and at home.

yeah...u've hurt her deep...in fact it's really really hard to find such a nice girl nowadays...those exs of mine who seems really hurt when i broke up with them ended up sleeping around and stuffs like that...your's is a very deciplined girl. You should've cherished her

my first love in sec sch which lasted 2 years was the most memorable...she became quite a loose girl now according to news i heard :(

just my 2 cents worth :)

[HaiLokSan]

Me alot memories about 1st love but when its time to let go,u can't hold on an't more.
Alot of pple find gf down the road based on their impressions of their 1st love.No reasons explained,but mostly its true tt 1st love acounts for the later stages of ur life of finding the perfect 1.

[bhoven]

I just hope she will never know. And I never know things will turn out this way; the effect of a single decision can last for years. I just hope she will meet a better man than me because she deserved to be love by one.

So sad to hear your story.....

But why do you feel that you are not good enough for her.?
What she thinks of you and how she feels about you is what matters, in a relationship what others may think of you should not be that important..

Did her mom hint that being a poly grad you were not good enough for her?
One must sometimes listen to one's heart and not try to rationalise too much. Trust me..I have travelled that route before...

[shadowlunar04]

So sad to hear your story.....

But why do you feel that you are not good enough for her.?
What she thinks of you and how she feels about you is what matters, in a relationship what others may think of you should not be that important..

Did her mom hint that being a poly grad you were not good enough for her?
One must sometimes listen to one's heart and not try to rationalise too much. Trust me..I have travelled that route before...

No, her mom did not despise me. As a matter of fact, she treated me like a son. It just that I feel she deserve things better than just me. Yah, maybe, some of that inferior thinkings came into the picture too. But, I still feel she would have a better life without me.

[Clonie]

wat a waste...well..smtms wat we tink is good for her/them but they might no tink like wise..mayb u shldnt have done wat u did back then..oh well...it's aleadi over..no point tinking abt..u cant trun back time..

[gobal100]

it is really sad to heard this. Just like the story same as me. My gf in 3 month time prepare for her final exams in NTU. Break her up so that she can concerate on her study. Afterall when she finished her exams is a grad for me is still a poly one and she enter society will see more guys richer and better than me. My pay is just that little and enjoy for a person that don expect much in life..

[bhoven]

it is really sad to heard this. Just like the story same as me. My gf in 3 month time prepare for her final exams in NTU. Break her up so that she can concerate on her study. Afterall when she finished her exams is a grad for me is still a poly one and she enter society will see more guys richer and better than me. My pay is just that little and enjoy for a person that don expect much in life..

But thats what we don't want/and often criticise .. Sillipore gals to be/for ...

to be materialistic and calculating and just go for guys who are richer and brainier .... its a sad fact of life that many are like this but then is there any need to "encourage" the few exceptions along this route or to " discourage "those same few who are not so inclined..

[saint_1979]

Bro shadowlunar04,

Sometimes, we guys think that our thinkings and actions are right and are for their good.

I had thought of breaking up w my current gf as i will be away for study for 2yrs. I have spoken this matter to my close female friends abt it. And guess wat? Instead of feeling sorry for me, I kena lectured by them. Saying that u guys always do what you all think are right & suitable for us (girls). Have you spare a thought on what we want? You are just damm selfish and self-thinking that tat's a noble thing to do. We, girls are grown-up. We know what we want. Cant you give us a choice to decide on our own.

Well, with tat, I spoke w my gf abt whether she wanted to continue or break up the relationship. In the end, we still a couple.

[singexpat]

hmm.. juz to share my minor experience..

most memorable will be my first love (corny.. but reali true..)
till date, breakup abt 8yrs liao.. but still remember her house number n unit clearly..

was together for abt 4yrs plus n started in sec 2.. ya kanna rotan but who cares at tht time rite??

were veri happy together till we went to seperate polys..
my in e east n hers in e west.. how to meet??

then my LJ itchy, go sian a classmate in poly n then dunno wat to do..
started givin her e hot-cold treatment n she called me one night... (not rainin ah)..

Her: Tink its beta for us to remain as friends..
Mr: Y?? (two-time liao still CB kia.. hiaz..)
Her: The feelin seems to be different now..
Me: Wat change?? I still e same wat.. U like another guy izzi?? (still CB kia..)
Her: Y u accuse me of havin another guy?? (my LP froze) Its reali different now..
Me: can explain more??
Her: U answer me.. U with me now is bcos of habit or bcos of love??
*My mouth dried.. dunno wat to say.. juz remain quiet*
Her: See.. u cannot even answer.. so u dun even know urself.. I'm tired, i cannot keep this on longer..
*then my tears juz flow.. n i choked on my saliva.. dunno wat to say..*
Her: N i cannot take it when u always tell me that "i like ah.. dun disturb me" (standard CB kia words to GF... super hiaz..."
Her: I controllin my tears now cos i dun wan my family to know..

i cannot remember wat happened next.. onli knew i reali stunned n juz cried..
tht night, i reflected on our 4 yrs together..
n realised i have become a bastard.. i took her V n she has done so much for me.. n i dun appreciate her..

Met her again durin my final yr (1 yr later) at poly.. tht time she workin liao cos i stay back 1 yr in poly.. (retribution of CB kia)..
She lost a lot of weight.. n face look so haggard.. like been through a lot..

thts y.. i told myself.. hav to cherish my gf in future..
cannot be CB kia again.. (now still a bit..)

sorry to hijack ur thread ah Bro shadowlunar04..

[Garf]

I kena lectured by them. Saying that u guys always do what you all think are right & suitable for us (girls). Have you spare a thought on what we want? You are just damm selfish and self-thinking that tat's a noble thing to do. We, girls are grown-up. We know what we want. Cant you give us a choice to decide on our own.
Right, this exactly what I want to say too. My first bf also said becos for my sake he didn't wanted me to wait him and found another good guy. So he broke with me. At that time I didn't knew how to say, even can't say 'No'. How he know what is good to me and wat is not? If I dun want to wait, I will leave, but dun need anyone to tell me when to leave, sigh.
Now, I only care am I happy in this relation but not how long will it can last. Who can tell tomorrow? life is short.

[Xazz]

Bro Shadowlunar04, was really touched after reading your story. Kinda feel sad for you and the girl. Sometimes, true love is knowing when to let go and I
really have to admire your for being able to do that. Guess it must have hurt you alot too when you initiated the breakup.

Let's just hope the girl will meet someone she really deserved as you have hoped and wish you all the best too for being such a considerate person.
:o

[shadowlunar04]

Bro Shadowlunar04, was really touched after reading your story. Kinda feel sad for you and the girl. Sometimes, true love is knowing when to let go and I
really have to admire your for being able to do that. Guess it must have hurt you alot too when you initiated the breakup.

Let's just hope the girl will meet someone she really deserved as you have hoped and wish you all the best too for being such a considerate person.
:o

Thanks for the compliments. I agree with your views too. It's like the lyrics in the song, "Heaven know", "If you really love her, you gonna set her free, if she returns in kind, I'll know she's mine.........". At that time, I really love her a lot and I believe she do too. But, I know she will meet a better person than me and I rather suffer the pain for her. Even though she's also in pain but I believe a short lived pain is better than a prolonged one. Up till now, I can feel that she still haven't given up hope on it. Maybe, that's why she's still a single. We don't talk about it now but it's something you can just feel it without asking or saying it out. And inside me, I still have some feelings for her but I prefer it to be remained buried deep inside..............

[BenQ]

YO brother SL really a touching story but in the end i feel if after she came back n both of u are single u shd be toggether cos its hard for a couple to maintain a relationship when they are not together but in the end u two end up single after she came back so u shd treasure the relationship.

[shadowlunar04]

YO brother SL really a touching story but in the end i feel if after she came back n both of u are single u shd be toggether cos its hard for a couple to maintain a relationship when they are not together but in the end u two end up single after she came back so u shd treasure the relationship.

What you say is true, benq. When she came back, both of us are still unattached. But that time, I have this funny thinking she deserved a better man than me. You can say it's a inferior thing. Like I mentioned before, she did wanted to patch back with me. But I don't know why I didn't (maybe it's because of my character). I always said, live everyday to the fullest and leave no regrets behind. If there is one regret I have to look back, I think this is it..........

[blade]

wah bro shadow..ur story sad sad..but still its really hard to maintain a long distance relationship..tats wat i feel n tats also why i regret i nv go after one gal.. :( she is getting married soon..n i still feel a tinge of regret(bitterness?) about it..but maybe becos we din get to be lovers, we are the best of frens..a fair trade?maybe.. :cool:

[shadowlunar04]

wah bro shadow..ur story sad sad..but still its really hard to maintain a long distance relationship..tats wat i feel n tats also why i regret i nv go after one gal.. :( she is getting married soon..n i still feel a tinge of regret(bitterness?) about it..but maybe becos we din get to be lovers, we are the best of frens..a fair trade?maybe.. :cool:

Life is like that. You will feel something lost inside when you are unable to be with the ones you love or loved. I'm happily married now but whenever I think of her, I can't help feeling that tingling pain inside..........

[BenQ]

What you say is true, benq. When she came back, both of us are still unattached. But that time, I have this funny thinking she deserved a better man than me. You can say it's a inferior thing. Like I mentioned before, she did wanted to patch back with me. But I don't know why I didn't (maybe it's because of my character). I always said, live everyday to the fullest and leave no regrets behind. If there is one regret I have to look back, I think this is it..........

Yo brother SL for me mine is my first love which started when i was 18 n she was 15 gg 16.we were together for almost 3 yrs b4 she had a change of heart n like another guy whom she know for 3 mths.I was in my NS then then seldom have time to keep her company.Things eventually come to an end when she told me she had gone stead with the guy n tat was the first time i cried in life.But lucky i got a few good mates in the camp who keep console me n things soon got better as i was gg to ORD.After 3 mths she call me again saying she had broke off with the guy n hinted maybe we can patch backbut i had no confidence in her thenso i reject her.Managed to put things back in 6 mths time n starts to think of the sweet memories n maybe if i treat her better then e guy wont stand a chance.Tilll now we are still good friend n she is married with a guy who love her so much n i m happy for her cos like wat u say i wont be able to give her happiness like wat her husband do for her.

[Weht]

Time for sharing. I hope bros and sis here can share their most memorable (up to date) love relationship. No fantasy here hor. :D

Let me get the ball rolling....

I just hope she will meet a better man than me because she deserved to be love by one.

Bro my story is from the other end when I was oversea. Will try to post later as it will be quite long...

at the mean time, any exp from other bros?

[Weht]

Any more from other bros? I will share mine later. A bit long like bro lunar hope bros can bear with it... ;)

[whycare]

Most of the time.... Guys will only realise the True Luv he was looking for... was actually just beside him all the while till he walked away from it... At the end of the day he will then regret why he didnt treasure it from the start...

PPl will always say time will heal everything.... But when one fine day u touch your heart and feel... you will know the scar will always be there....

[kevric]

PPl will always say time will heal everything.... But when one fine day u touch your heart and feel... you will know the scar will always be there....

Ya.. I totally agree on that. :(

[vesfreq]

it is really sad to heard this. Just like the story same as me. My gf in 3 month time prepare for her final exams in NTU. Break her up so that she can concerate on her study. Afterall when she finished her exams is a grad for me is still a poly one and she enter society will see more guys richer and better than me. My pay is just that little and enjoy for a person that don expect much in life..

Sigh... Sometimes, its better not to think about what will happen tomorrow. As the Chinese saying goes, there will always be a taller mountain behind those which you can see.

My first temp job was with a stat board. Back then, I was fresh out of NS with only an A level. -_- There was this sweet young girl whom I was very interested to know, but she was a grad. I used to tell myself the same things. ie, "I don't have paper, no career, etc". It only made things worse, cos' I left the place without even having the chance to talk to her or get her contact number.

Moral of the story is, whack first and ask qns later. At least, if kenna rejected, can forget about her. But, there can be no result, if you never try. As my pal told me, "Never mind if 9 out of 10 rejected you. So long as 1 out of 10 accept you. Its still success!"

If I am to meet this girl again today, I will be very confident to ask her out for a date. The people around you are right.... money and career matters. It makes a difference, unfortunately.

I used to be you and my monthly pay didn't even exceed a thousand. Effective take home pay was barely more than 500 bucks a month. I was asked to leave, without notice. Even an old irc female friend looked down on me. How bad could things get? My ex-gf and I broke up in less than 1/2 a year.

All that bad experience was, fortunately, not permanent. I still made it through, though not the biggest F in the company. I'm sure a lot of the other bros experienced this "process" before. Its a hard and painful one.

The moral of the story is, if you choose to be where you are, you will remain where you are. The bad news is the typical Singapore girl don't like contented guys. Sigh.... You probably know it. ie, must have 5Cs.

Its going to be a heart wrenching process, if you decide to walk out of where you are. The fact that most of the girls are materialistic and screwed up. We can't escape from this reality, unless you get a foreign wife. The only way to get out of it is ... to beat the Sillypore's girls' game.

Do well and do very well. Earn your bragging rights. Suffering is temporal and glory is eternal. I believe that you have every ability to make it through. If all else proves to be too difficult, there is always a SB forum behind you. :)

[Weht]

Seem that a lot of ppl believe the social class, or educ class mentality. I was also like this. Many times the brain was like berserk, keep spinning on the negative thoughts going forward. End up inaction was the decision.

Meet a temp gal temping in my ex-co too. She was about to go Oz for studies. Was as said thinking that I am dip holder, she was pretty, cute, how she will like me… But now thinking back, she ever tried followed me when walking to toilet once. It was just so close and yet inaction beat me again. Limpeh mouth got gold cannot open….aiya regret now…

Will tell my oversea r’ship about me later. Very long dun know how to start too ;P

[addielow]

Life is like that. You will feel something lost inside when you are unable to be with the ones you love or loved. I'm happily married now but whenever I think of her, I can't help feeling that tingling pain inside..........


Bro,u really wei ta,i really admire the way u handler this issue,welldone bro add point for ur wei ta. ;)

[vesfreq]

Meet a temp gal temping in my ex-co too. She was about to go Oz for studies. Was as said thinking that I am dip holder, she was pretty, cute, how she will like me… But now thinking back, she ever tried followed me when walking to toilet once. It was just so close and yet inaction beat me again. Limpeh mouth got gold cannot open….aiya regret now…



I went through the same stuff. Sigh.... u r right. To quote Donald Rumsfeld, "The price of inaction is greater than that of action."

I think the next one I see must thick skin a bit and open my mouth. Sigh.....

Don't regret. There is always next time.