Re: married men
 

TS,

first I would like to say its great to see liberal women like you around who are not afraid to enjoy good sex.

However reality does bite and we still belong to a traditional Asian society despite SG's multinational metropolitan reputation. Ask yourself if establishing a family is one of your life goals. If it is, I would suggest you don't destroy your future happiness by becoming what we men call a easyrider. Take extra caution when selecting a FB, do protect yourself.

Sg is a terribly small place with tons of people knowing each another and people do like gossip. If the guy tires of you don't be surprised he'll pass your info to some other guy and let him take over. Your reputation can be tarnished over a single men's outing with a guy bragging about his conquests. We men can separate sex and feelings much better than women. With a easyrider reputation it will be tough to hook a decent life partner.

There are few things men wouldn't do for sex. Sex is one of our prime biological directives along with power & domination. Hence, lying is just a negligible hurdle for us. The unhappiness trick is one of the oldest tricks in the book. The main aim is to pander to your female ego that You are the ONLY one who can bring me relief, thereby increasing your self worth and stimulating your innate caregiver tendency as a woman. Its a cheap psychological illusion. Another very old trick is to steer the direction of the date to create a point where you're more open physically & emotionally to sex . Eg, slow walk on a desolate beach after a nice dinner to create privacy and lower inhibition. Talking about emotional stuff to bring you emotionally closer and allow you to empatise.

Let's just say men who are good at the game rarely learn this from teachers, its largely through experience. Which means he has done this probably with a lot of women.

Hope you gain a different perspective from this! Might get zapped for revealing trade secrets LOL.:p

Re: married men
 

Second ur comment. Well said. :) Very enlightening.

Re: married men
 

Think the reply and response you made towards him, make him have different thinking... I have a friend like you... Who will sometimes talk, and somehow side track to sex stuff... I'm a open-minded guy so sometimes will sex chat with her as well... Frankly speaking, do have some naughty thoughts towards her sometimes... which I think is common... Whenever we meet, will try to 'seduce' her... In the past, really 'succeed', and for sure, we have lots of bed story as well... Recently we get back with each other again, and often talk via watsapp as well.. We still talk side track sometimes which lead to sex topic again... Whenever she asked me y I always have 'naughty' thinking, I told her that the way she talk/chat/msg makes me thinking y y...

So probably you are one of them as well... Perhaps you may want to control your msg, and probably not to share/talk too much personal stuff, which may lead him think y y... :)

Re: married men
 

Thanks EtherC for a little insight into what goes on in men's brains.. all those thoughts about my contact being shared and all does occur to me.. guess you probably have the thought that my exbfs that came contacting me again know each other.. therefore the mentioning about sharing contacts.. but they don't know each other one leh.. from different groups of friends..

Anyway.. thanks for your lengthy advice.. :)

Re: married men
 

i don't think my messages make him think y y leh.. he ownself think y y first.. i don't mind talking about it as friend.. like how i do with my close guy friends.. just talking only wat.. if he wanna think too until he thinks he has a chance.. then he abit.. think too highly of himself. :o

Re: married men
 

All I can say is that men will try their luck to get between your legs
It's whether you want to or not and whether you encourage them.

I have married ex bfs coming to me to pour out their problems. But it stays at that but maybe it's because I'm married and they don't think I'm inclined to want to sleep with them.

Likewise I also hv single ex-bfs coming to me with their problems but they hope that I will sleep with them because I'm the perfect no strings attached partner if I ever sleep with them.

Thing is, I'm very open when I talk. I can share personal stuff and I can talk about sex (not talk dirty though) but that doesn't mean that I will sleep with the guy. I think you just have to be very very clear about that. I talk to my guy friends about sex but I make it very clear to them that just because I talk about it doesn't mean that I"m open to doing it with you. They are all very respectful of that and appreciate that they can talk to me without me taking offense and they respect that I'm not going to have any hanky panky with them.

Works out fine so far.

Re: married men
 

Sister, so many samster given their point of view. The bottom line is where do you stand? Do you still want to have anything to do with them after they already married? Talk can slowly get very serious and cause alot of problems later on.

Better to stop all past ex r/s, it'll do you good for your future. Although it may happen that the ex may also know your BF (if you've one now). But as long as the line had been drawn, made known to your BF that you've totally given the past ex's r/s the axe, no need to worry anymore.:)

Re: married men
 

thanks! it's heartening to know that you managed to get it into their minds that you are not keen on sex. i have an ex, i used to just chat with him as a friend until he decided to start suggesting indecent stuff.. then i told him off and etc and that he shd focus on his wife and kids.. but no use. that guy is still pestering me (msging me) which i ignore until now since 2 years ago but he's still trying! :rolleyes:

now this is another ex that is married with kids too, which i just want to maintain as friends. just hope nothing like the last exbf will happen

Re: married men
 

Did you tell him straight in the face "I will not sleep with you" besides focusing on his wife and kids? Sometimes if you don't be that direct they think they still hv a chance.

Of course if he disappears after, you are better off without him as a friend anyway.

But I hv to tell you the smarter ones stop the nonsense but let you know that if you ever change yr mind, they are available for booty calls.

Re: married men
 

Like Darina said, just tell them straight in their faces saying "Be good to your family, we can only be normal friends!"

I never have Exs coming to ask me for sex favours (no exs before) but being approached by one samster who keep asking me to be his FB after I posted some comments and started a thread here. I just tell him, no. Most recent try of his, I said Never.

I also have a friend's husband who tried hard to obtain my number from his wife and start asking me out for breakfasts, meals, and told me he is interested to pet with me, and for me to fall into his trap of asking for sex willingly with him. Not once, but twice, thrice. Once he got fustrated of unable to get me, he turned tactic and ask to be friends, and it start all over again untill recently I said NO to him and cut off all contacts.

So, its really up to you, TS to stop him from 'pestering' you although you may like his attention. I am willing to give up getting attention because I rather he be nicer to his family than me being 'one of the third party' to hurt my girlfriend.

Hope you stand firm and know what you are doing. ;)

Re: married men
 

Alan0338.. dun be confused... i think TS likes the thrill and attention of being hunted..

it is very obvious that those men are interested in sex with her.. and i dun think she is that "innocent" not to know that..

like wat some samtress posted, if something is wrong, either tell them off or cut off all contacts..

question is, did TS still continue to maintain contact and giving the horny bastards some lingering hope? .. when she can watapps the guy "ur wife around is it?? " .. she is indirectly telling him that she knows he is married but its ok to continue to flirt !! ..


TS.. welll.... we dun have to be friends ..*hint*...

Re: married men
 

yap.. i have told him straight that i will not consider doing anything with him and alwayz ask him to focus on his wife n kid.. still havent disappear, but also haven't stop trying.. still not turnoff by i alwayz talk about his wifey

Re: married men
 

i know men are interested in sex but i still think tat male-female friendships are still possible but seems tat i alwayz unlucky :(

and hoh.. asking whether wife around is it.. is to try to confirm my suspicions tat there is a need to hide and not encourage to flirt!!! :mad:

watz with tat we dun have to be friends hint? :confused:

Re: married men
 

Sexual attraction are naturally inherent btwn both sexes , whether one goes to bed eventually or not , does not matter .
You may have size him up over time & found he can only be a good friend since he is now happily/legally married & he shouldnt have the best of both worlds ... he maybe persistent in pursuing you cos he knows you're soft-hearted & stand a chance to bed you ..:D
Just let it be, nothing you can do more ( except to break all contacts ) & Iam sure the message is clear to him/ex that you're not in for a sexual r/s ..;)

Re: married men
 

Hello sister, i think you very bo liao lor!

Quote one of them....

Re: Rape fantasies

my bf likes to do that to me to.. grab my ponytail and spank my butt.. i love it too.. always ask him to spank harder and fuck me harder..


Not sure what do you want to achieve in this thread started by you!:confused::p

Re: married men
 

Why do people, especially females, like to remain as "friend" to an ex? :confused:

IMHO, if the break off is recent, remain as "friends" usually means one party is still hopeful of a reunion. If it's been a long while, then the party who requested to be "friend" is looking for some "benefits" after such a long break. No?

Re: married men
 

Almost all true. I am probably one married man who wants to have a FB. But the difference is I don't lie. I am truly not happy with my sex life and there are men out there who are suffering because their partner are not keen in making love.

Re: married men
 

Very much agreed to what Bros says.

Re: married men
 

Then why get married?
There's no perfect sex partner in this life.

Re: married men
 

sex was perfect for the first 10 years until she got religious,went vegan and everything went stale. can you imagine every 1st and 15th no sex and worst i have to eat vegetarian with her. Then no more beef and seafood as well.

Re: married men
 

I knw how it feel, at home just follow her, you an still eat outside.

Re: married men
 

Yes, unfortunately its true.

Re: married men
 

Religious is by heart nt to be done against the will. U can make known to her, gotta buck up ur communication or izzit Pure sianz after being together for more than 10 yrs. Afterall this is human nature.

Men will always like to get "harmless"NSA flings outside to spice up the boring routine life but to return to their wives eventually.

Tts y for those who's serious, don ever get involved with married men, not even 1-1date. For those who dun wan to get hurt, get lost instead.

Re: married men
 

That sounds damn tragic man. Oh my.

Re: married men
 

Thanks for some brothers who understand my plight. Apart from sex that had gone stale with my wife else she is perfect. She works, she cooks well, she keeps the house clean but I'm a man in the forties and I'm highly sex. So what else can i do? If any wives here who are also highly sex and their husband can't satisfy you, what would you do? What's your advise?:(

Re: married men
 

Very True Bro
but you put yourself into her shoe as a full time houusewife ... (i.e cook for you, do the house chores, take care your children) all this daily routine ... do you think they still can fantasize sex ...
why dun you take a week leave and to try do these things ... ...
nevertheless, no man will be satisfied in sex ... no matter how many women they had bed ... i have been screwing around since i was 17 ... if i am lucky i will be having lots of children around the world ...;p

Re: married men
 

U r really lucky to marry a good wife, wat more can u ask for? Give her a surprise by booking a nice room in MBS, swim n relax at the pool, wine/dine her before spicing up ur sex life in the room? Never give up trying.

Re: married men
 

Thanks Brothers for all the advise. I tried to spice up by going to hoildays (two of us only) and nice dinner but all to waste. She cooks only on weekends and she is now almost vegetarian. I now cannot have sex during the 1st and 15th of the lunar month and auspicious days like Vesak day and all the gods birthday. Can no longer do oral sex with her as the mouth is used for praying so is sacred. Believe me I have tried. What to do?

Re: married men
 

I think u need to communicate with her and make known your feelings. Choose the right time/ambience n voice out your thoughts. Bottom up do both parties no good.

Nabez, i feel you bro. Though mine not so extreme, but the mouth for praying part i can identify.