Quote:
Originally Posted by micmac888
In the locals' (both chinese and non-chinese) minds. The bule is not generally welcomed in their hearts, next... is ... Sporeans. :
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This is only partially true.
Just 5 years ago, it was enough to show my bule face to get big smiles and hand shakes everywhere I went in Batam, being it a mall or a pub or a disco.
Now, people is much more used to see bule all around, because the expat population increased significantly, and the "exotic face" effect has no power anymore. I must pass the first wall first, introduce myself, speak a while to lower barriers and proceed to the next step. Just smiling in the street is not enough anymore to get a new friend.
Even after this remark, I must say that in almost all environments I experienced a general positive bias of local people, both women and men, towards bule! I never experienced some hostile or even cold feeling. People is always kind and warm with me. This is what I like above all in Batam: the positive attitude of people (and this further motivates me to not disappoint anyone).
For what reasons are bule welcome? Certainly two above all:
1) Bule are in general not stingy, offer drinks liberally, and are known as "generous", not only with ladies but also with ojek, taxi, waiters, etc. This is in striking contrast to the typical Singaporean or Malaysian. If a price is 198rm (guess where?), the Singaporean will demand the 2rm change back, while a Western tourist will feel ashamed to accept it. ("money is the most powerful aphrodisiac", but a big door opener also in other contexts)
2) Girls like the "exotic" face and nose of bule, exactly as I literally die for the flat nose and big eyes of Indo girls.
Does this warm attitude and kindness actually hide some repulsion in their hearts? I don't believe so, at least with 90% of people I have befriended in Batam.
But there is still one important remark to make. The vast majority of bule we see in Batam is frankly not a good company: always drunk, noisy, covered by tattoo, spending hours, beer after beer, in pubs of kampung bule, dressed very lousy with cargo shorts even at night, even on a date with a girl who dressed up nicely. This well explains the initial antipathy that many locals may feel for the average bule in Batam. And that is where I focus my attention when I meet a girl: show I am not that kind of bule (I am not cheating: the only pub where I go is No Name).
In general, I'd say that in a foreign land more important than "being humble" is having RESPECT. Respect everyone, stay within limits, and everyone will respect you.