I was in seventh heaven. In just a couple of days, I had found two ways to get hot and bothered in ways I never had before. On Marcus table I would get to have faceless strangers tying me down and filling my holes, and from my doctors' appointment a couple of days ago I had learned how much I liked to be used by older guys. Preferably dirty older guys.
Both urges were so humiliating, and I still felt waves of shame every time I indulged in fantasies, but the shame only turned me on more.
It was Saturday, and time for my appointment with Marcus. I was glad Dr. Fuck had cum along up and covered my face in cum in between my massage appointments, or the waiting would have been unbearable.
I was certain that Marcus had a new customer waiting to use me. I fantasized about what holes he would use and how hard he would take me. I wondered with a sting of excitement if maybe Marcus would join in today. Maybe letting me suck his cock?
I even allowed myself to wish he would order me to do little bit of good-little-slut-girl- roleplaying. It had been extremely hot. Maybe I could figure out a way to tease the guys into going for it?
Today I was wearing my pink lace panties. The boxer shorts I had used during my last appointment seemed to have worked, but I felt sexier in these, and I was sure Marcus would come up with a way to make fucking me seem like abuse no matter what I was wearing.
I kept teasing my pussy all day, touching it while I was working, letting a hand slip inside my panties under the table at a meeting, rubbing it on the hard armrest of a colleague's chair with my legs a little bit too wide apart. I kept myself nice and aroused.
But then at 2pm came the text.
"Unfortunately, I have to cancel today's appointment.
Will be in touch to reschedule.
Best regards,
Marcus Tremendous
Leg. Masseur"
I was perplexed. No massage? No table with restraints? No cum-filled pussy or strangers with huge cocks? I felt like crying. I also understood that was a total overreaction, and I felt ashamed.
I sat down at my desk and felt the heat behind my eyelids.
I was incredibly disappointed. I felt discarded. All my insecurities came rushing in. I wasn't even good enough to use. Marcus had thrown me away like an old, used rug. He had found someone more fuckable than me. Rebecca had sent someone better his way.
I got the urge to call Rebecca, the way I always did when life got the better of me, but I realized she was the last person I could talk to about this. And the first, I observed, since she was the only person I could talk to about this. I was utterly alone.
As if on que, my phone rang, and the screen announced it was Rebecca. What were the odds?
We hadn't talked since Monday when she had fixed me that session with Marcus, or shall I say tricked me into being used by Marcus? I had no urge to talk to her, angry and ashamed at the same time.
The phone kept ringing. I felt miserable. Rebecca was probably the only person who would understand. I decided to answer after all.
"You answered!" she announced.
"I did", I replied gloomily.
"I'm so glad, I haven't heard from you all week and I miss you, bestie!"
Like nothing had happened.
"Well, I haven't exactly been very available".
"No shit", she laughed. "I've been sending you texts. Work still getting to you, is it?"
"Well, yes, but ..."
"That's why I'm calling, actually. It's Saturday, baby, we should totally go out and get hammered and get you to relax a little. Like the good old days!"
"I'm not sure I want that." But even the phone call itself made me relax a little, and it felt good. Rebecca was obviously going to pretend nothing had happened, and that meant we weren't going to talk about it. I could stop worrying.
Also, it would allow me to go out and get drunk with her, just as she said: like in the old days, without it getting embarrassing. That was a nice thought.
"Sure. I'll hit town, but let's not stay out all night. I'm too old for that shit."
"You are so not too old. I'll show you! You can take more than you think!"
"No, Rebecca, you won't show me. Promise you won't, or I'm not coming."
"Ok ok, we'll call it an early night. Meet me at The Shining Cock at eight, ok?"
"The Shining Cock? What kind of a fucking place is that?"
"It's this new place, I go there all the time. An old-fashioned pub, mahogany walls and plush chairs and elegant bartender and everything, you'll love it! Down at Main street to the left, right across from the hardware store. Where The Dinkie Store used to be, remember?"
"Ah, yeah. That new place. Mahogany, you say? Ok, I'll see you there at eight."
I was still depressed and felt like shit when we hung up, but at least Rebecca gave me something to fill the evening with, and some booze would surely get my mind off Marcus and his table.
I slipped into a cute little dress I got a few months ago but hadn't had the opportunity to wear. Light yellow and wide at the bottom, the kind that would turn into a wobbly flower if I spun around, with tiny pink flowers and thin shoulder straps, covering my ass with a quite bit of marginal. Wouldn't want to seem like a slut in front of Rebecca. Wouldn't want to give her the satisfaction.
I put my hair up in a prudent ponytail and slipped on my ballerina shoes. Then I looked myself in the mirror.
OMG!! I look like I dressed for Sunday school. Modesty in all its glory, I was going out to party, and maybe I should allow myself to look good.
I changed into a pair of yellow heels, to compensate for the sweet, innocent dress, and added to my make-up. Sooty eyes and deep red lipstick. I removed my bra and let my breasts hang loose in the little dress. I stepped back in front of the mirror and regarded the result.
Yep, perfect. Not too sweet, not to hot. Night on town, here I come!