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Bringing women to a climax
For men perhaps the most important thing to realise about female climaxes is that with women, it's not a mechanical thing – as it generally is with men.
You see, most males will ejaculate quite quickly if they have their penises rubbed. This applies even if the circumstances aren't very romantic – or even if they don't particularly like the person who's doing the rubbing! Women are not like this. Female orgasm isn't a push-button response. The conditions have to be right.
Although females vary, many women need the following if they're going to reach a climax easily:
- a romantic atmosphere
- pleasant, comfortable surroundings
- a partner who they really like
- a feeling of being wanted and appreciated
- a good flow of natural lubrication - so that the delicate female parts don't get sore
- a skilled partner who knows how to stimulate their clitoris.
Unless you can provide the above, you are not going to have great success in giving your partner orgasms.
Please bear in mind that – contrary to what many men think – sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman's clitoris.
Nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth.
So, try not to give the impression to your female partner that she ‘ought’ to be able to climax through intercourse alone and that that is what you think of as ‘proper sex’. The sex menu can be a varied one. Some women, for example, find it really easy to climax through oral sex – particularly if the guy is patient and sensitive to what his partner wants. And how does he find out what she wants and what turns her on? Well, a wise man will ask her.
What he should not do is to assume that his technique is flawless and that if his partner does not come, it’s her fault. Plenty of men think that because a previous girlfriend always came a certain way, this one should follow suit. Women are not all the same in their likes or dislikes. So do try to treat your partner as an individual.
Many women like much more foreplay or loveplay than men imagine. They want to feel that the man is keen on giving pleasure – and not just in a hurry to have his own climax. In fact, the worst thing a man can say to a woman is: ‘Haven’t you come yet?’ This is likely to make her feel extremely inadequate and will ruin any build-up of sexual pleasure and tension that might have been taking place.
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