Quote:
Originally Posted by aarion
I didn't want to comment till i saw what this brother wrote.
Let me share my part of the story. I have know my wife for the past ten years of courting. We have sex every moment we have.
On our 8th year, we broke up due to my less attention and also her family pressure to choose me over them. Her father hated me and also there was a new guy. I worked super hard to win her back and also managed to reconcile with the family.
Then this is where the sex went down hill. It is exactly what the bro wrote above. Then before our first anniversary, my friends and I took a trip up to Danok.
To cut story short, came back and she found out due to my stupidity. Sex was even worst than before. I was hoping for the worst like slap, scold and kick me out of the house but instead i got mind tortured. We decided to reconcile the marriage but she is not willing to move forward. She doesn't want to blame me but blame on my friends instead.
Every arguments we have brings up the trip I had and all the pain i cost. I just feel that bring me back to guilt trip would not help us to move forward at all. I know it is not easy but I don't see an effort at all. Whatever i do is not good enough.
We are already seeing counseling, but from my last visit. I realized that she doesn't want to let go of the past and keep on insisting I should be the only one doing all the work to make this marriage work. I really feel like i can't breath sometimes. I really want to give up and walk away. Life is too short to be burden by emotional bondage. What would you guys and gals think and advice?
Sorry, if i have wrote this in the wrong section.
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You have tried many methods in your ways.
Have you tried honestly asking her what exactly she wants?
You understand she's blaming you, but did she want out or she want to work things out?
If she can't understand what she wants, you two will be in limbo till that happens. You are ready, she isn't. Hope you have the patience to let her realise her own actions.
Or maybe, you can find a way to let her release that anger that preventing you two from moving forward. Need to find that particular switch in her, pushing all other buttons won't work that well.
Jia you!