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Old 16-11-2012, 08:17 AM
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Re: Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hurricane88 View Post
pls think thrice before marrying a foreigner esp. Viet spouse if you dun earn much...first of all...you dun get Viet wife in Sinkie who are mostly WL...so means you need to find good gals in Vietnam...frequent travelling and long distance relationship is tough...means you need to learn how to speak Vietnamese...then after courtship marriage means applying LTVP, PR, etc...which can be very painful for low income earners...Viet gal expect most Sinkie man to be rich...so you need to give her better life than what she already had in Vietnam...then only come to the expectation of MIL or in-laws...so hope you understand there is a long list of requirements before you marry a Viet spouse...

in summary...
1) dun marry WL in Sinkie
2) need to travel frequently to Vietnam to find decent GF...
3) long distance relationship is tough
4) many IDD calls which is costly unless VB knew internet msg
5) VB need to come Sinkie frequent visits which can be costly unless stay with you...heard each visits can cost from SGD 500 to thousands...shopping, entertainment, travelling, etc...
6) Anxiety for applying LTVP, PR, etc..
7) cultural difference...
8) food difference..
9) Learning languages means communication difficulty for her and yourself...
10) provide spouse a better life than what she had before in vietnam
11) monthly or regular remittance to in-laws can cause quarrels if not set expectation correctly...
12) in-law demands such as...funeral, marriage, buy property, repair house, etc...deemed as emergencies...

the above are my 2 cents worth and not meant to discourage you but hope you think thrice before making decisions...

Let me quote here what I heard as examples...these are from friends who went to Vietnam first time and spending money on VBs...

1) A sinkie travel 5hrs to province just to hold a VB hands...he spent 4mil VND which is SGD 235.00 for the entire trip...

2) A sinkie was asked to go shopping with VB and friend in hcm...spent 4mil VND and VB still address him as ban or friend and not Anh or Bro which is much closer in relationship...

both men are pretty young late 20s or early 30s...spent more than SGD 1k for entire trip...but at the rate cannot frequent Vietnam monthly...so the VBs dun have faith in them due to long wait and making demands each time...
What Bro H88 is very true and the truth hurts. I have seen many VB married to low income Singaporean man and trying very very hard to get PR. Getting PR is not that difficult if the VB marry an educated Singaporean man with decent income. But most of these educated Singaporean man will prefer to marry local Singaporean ladies. Vbs are always linked to the lower income group of Sinkie man and often, being looked down upon. There are many bros here whose wife got PR and they will tell you its not that difficult , provided the criteria for education and income of Singaporean man are met. Many sinkie man still think that marrying VB is CHEAP and GOOD. Its never cheap and good. Think about it, you got to provide a certain sum of money for her family monthly, often, they will have special requests for more. To add to the burden, the VB will tell you she wants to go back VN every few months as its `boring' in Singapore. The air ticket and expenses back there will add on to the burden. Think once, think twice and think thrice..... If you cannot feed yrself already, don't make life even more difficult by marrying a VB. You will bring misery to yrself and her and also her children. It hurts to hear this but its the truth.