Sex Addiction can cause bankruptcy

[kcpro]

While this sub forum mostly deals with STDs and physical issues I also wanted to start this thread recounting my own experiences with the mental health issues caused by porn and sex addiction and how over a long period of time (15 years) can ruin your career, your credit score and push you to the verge of bankruptcy.
I wanted to write my experiences here as I’m sure that I’m not alone and I’m making a come back (slow but sure ). Been ML/Fl free for 3 months and trying to get a grip on reality. Hopefully this helps someone as much as it will help me as a catharsis.
In a series of posts I want to document

1. How I got started into all of this
2. How I started using sex as escapism
3. My double life
4. Impact on social connections and personality
5. Impact on finances and the illusionary thinking
6. What got me back
7. The plan ahead to get my life back .


Also if someone is looking for a sounding board / buddy to be accountable to with the intent of making a come back and using commercial sex in moderation and/or totally quitting can also message me . I’d be glad to lend. Listening ear.

[corsiar74]

You already declared Bankrupt Bro?

Originally Posted by kcpro

While this sub forum mostly deals with STDs and physical issues I also wanted to start this thread recounting my own experiences with the mental health issues caused by porn and sex addiction and how over a long period of time (15 years) can ruin your career, your credit score and push you to the verge of bankruptcy.
I wanted to write my experiences here as I’m sure that I’m not alone and I’m making a come back (slow but sure ). Been ML/Fl free for 3 months and trying to get a grip on reality. Hopefully this helps someone as much as it will help me as a catharsis.
In a series of posts I want to document

1. How I got started into all of this
2. How I started using sex as escapism
3. My double life
4. Impact on social connections and personality
5. Impact on finances and the illusionary thinking
6. What got me back
7. The plan ahead to get my life back .


Also if someone is looking for a sounding board / buddy to be accountable to with the intent of making a come back and using commercial sex in moderation and/or totally quitting can also message me . I’d be glad to lend. Listening ear.

[kcpro]

Originally Posted by corsiar74

You already declared Bankrupt Bro?

No I didn’t , managed to borrow some to stave off bankruptcy.

Bankruptcy stays on your record for a few years and messed with employability

[corsiar74]

Nice to hear that. Take care and god bless Bro

Originally Posted by kcpro

No I didn’t , managed to borrow some to stave off bankruptcy.

Bankruptcy stays on your record for a few years and messed with employability

[donut88]

Originally Posted by kcpro

While this sub forum mostly deals with STDs and physical issues I also wanted to start this thread recounting my own experiences with the mental health issues caused by porn and sex addiction and how over a long period of time (15 years) can ruin your career, your credit score and push you to the verge of bankruptcy.
I wanted to write my experiences here as I’m sure that I’m not alone and I’m making a come back (slow but sure ). Been ML/Fl free for 3 months and trying to get a grip on reality. Hopefully this helps someone as much as it will help me as a catharsis.
In a series of posts I want to document

1. How I got started into all of this
2. How I started using sex as escapism
3. My double life
4. Impact on social connections and personality
5. Impact on finances and the illusionary thinking
6. What got me back
7. The plan ahead to get my life back .


Also if someone is looking for a sounding board / buddy to be accountable to with the intent of making a come back and using commercial sex in moderation and/or totally quitting can also message me . I’d be glad to lend. Listening ear.

Need sex addiction counseling help.

[cielbutterfly]

Originally Posted by kcpro

While this sub forum mostly deals with STDs and physical issues I also wanted to start this thread recounting my own experiences with the mental health issues caused by porn and sex addiction and how over a long period of time (15 years) can ruin your career, your credit score and push you to the verge of bankruptcy.
I wanted to write my experiences here as I’m sure that I’m not alone and I’m making a come back (slow but sure ). Been ML/Fl free for 3 months and trying to get a grip on reality. Hopefully this helps someone as much as it will help me as a catharsis.
In a series of posts I want to document

1. How I got started into all of this
2. How I started using sex as escapism
3. My double life
4. Impact on social connections and personality
5. Impact on finances and the illusionary thinking
6. What got me back
7. The plan ahead to get my life back .


Also if someone is looking for a sounding board / buddy to be accountable to with the intent of making a come back and using commercial sex in moderation and/or totally quitting can also message me . I’d be glad to lend. Listening ear.

I feel you bro. Sometimes i really hate it that god created man with lust. and Women can just make use of our "naturally-born" traits like lust to earn money with their bodies while we can't help because we has the needs to release. Of course, we can do it ourself by masturbation. But once in a while, we still need to turn back to pussy for the tightness and sensation that masturbation can never overcome. Sometimes I really hope I can take this lust away so that I will not be a sucker for sex.

Let me share my story, my ex-wife walked away from our 4years marriage. I looked for FL in 2024 for the first time after my divorce. It wasn't for sex, primarily because of the loneliness. sex is just secondary. I feel so down and I needed someone for companionship and filling the void and emptiness. Every time after visiting the FLs, I would feel good and distracted from unhappy life. I also spent few thousands a month, after some time I realized everything is just temporary and it's all a transaction. Using money to buy temporary happiness. Even now I try to distract myself by finding a hobby, something that I like physically so I can overcome my lust and emptiness.

[mikek]

Hello Bro kcpro,
Please continue your series of posts...
Thank you.

[kcpro]

Chapter 1: How it all started and the escalation spiral

One a month: (sgd 200 per month)

My first adventure with commercial sex actually started on an overseas trip. A few colleagues were posted to London and we lived in the suburbs.
There were brothel houses nearby that my colleagues had discovered by looking at newspaper ads.
A few of us went together and I lost my commercial sex virginity to a polish girl.
After than was into white girls and tried this a few times (one a month), white , Punjabi and Russian girls . Was paranoid as fuck about stds and so everything was capped.

Once a week (sgd 500 per month ) : Returned back to Singapore and sought the same thrill, Jalan Besar was my haunt , the PRC brothel houses at Kitchener road and the Malaysian health center at what is now Hotel 165. The prc brothel houses were thrilling with fresh new girls each week. Most of them green and wet.

This continued until I started dating my now wife and I stopped for a good year. She was my angel . After marriage we were strolling at orchard road and I gave into temptation with the excuse of just look look see see and strolled around cuppage plaza. Ended up at level 4 and full was on the menu. Was serviced by a Malaysia girl and that felt surreal. For the first time I had experienced what cheating felt like. I think it rewired something in my brain . I had cheated on my marriage and felt guilt for a month.

Thrice a week : ( sgd 1500 per month )

Over time commercial massage parlors and sex became a form of escapism. At the slightest stress I would seek commercial sex as a recourse. At the same time bad habits started to acrue - lying to my wife about my whereabouts (with friends or jogging ), seeking or planning about my next adventure, constantly using WeChat nearby and other apps to find MLs or someone horny.
This is about the time I had “success” on apps in finding women who were keen to explore . Started going on dates , spent lavishly on meals and gifts , would create and illusion of romance and have sex by the 3rd date.

Renting my own bachelor pad (sg 1500 for rent + another sgd 1500 on meals and gifts)

This is where the debt spiral started , banks were happy to open cash and credit lines and loaned out tons of money. My excuse to take them up was only to pay off existing credit cards . However instead of controlling my expenses it only gave me an opportunity to spend more . I now had my own bachelor pad and could bring girls over whenever I wanted . I still didn’t stay overnight. Housemates would look at me in fear and disgust, they knew the only time I visited was for long and loud sex sessions. PRC fuck buddies who I had met online on apps would use the place for a few days during their sg visits . I chose to ignore the costs , I was effectively living two lives. The cognitive dissonance wrecks your psyche and you get torn away from reality and your social life and family life suffers. Although I still managed to maintain a couple of friends and hold on to my marriage.

[energy_boi]

Interesting pls continue

[nairnair2424]

Which apps did u use to find women to hook up with?

[Hantu69]

Nice sharing there, please continue bro.

17+

[chevy7970]

Gosh. Thank you for sharing.

I know there are many mates who are stuck spending $$$ on sex, booze & companionship. I have a mate who went KTV 3 times a week. To him, thats the only place he find peace from his work. He do not fools around. Just enjoy the companionship. Anyway he is rich and his wife approved it.

Hope you come out strong and continue working towards starving off the addiction.