Is there true love?

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by dyelook

hmmm... yup..

true love... just hope you do find it someday...

Lol thanks bro..

I started this thread only because I hope it gives bros and sis who has lost that faith some strength..

I sincerely hope you'll find your eternal love too.

[Edyta]

Originally Posted by TheSeeker

Hi Sis,

Infatuation in my opinion is like the bud of love..
Nurture it with sunlight, water and the right kind of nutrition and it just might blossom..

While biological love is usually deem as unconditional, it derives from biological blood ties. There are some instances when parental love stops after having found out the kid isn't his/her as well. It's just 2 sides of the coin I suppose.

Yes, true love is rare not because it does not exists but because it requires meeting the right person under the right circumstances and both has to have/believe in the same objective.

And yes, if a relationship is based solely on good looks, wealth etc, it is conditional.

Of which good looks in my opinion is the most superficial because beauty fades in time. How many ah peks/ah mahs still looks good past 60s..?
Of course I don't mean to go for someone you can't stand looking at, just as long as he/she is presentable and 顺眼
At the end of the day, it is who stays on by your side and not who doesn't but looks good in him/her 20s, 30s etc..

As for wealth, 生不带来，死不带去.
For bros or sis who believes in flaunting wealth as a lure, I used to do that and think likewise too. It might feel good getting the attention of a drop dead gorgeous babe but if you decide to settle down, would you marry him/her.. Ask yourself if you are willing to lead your life with someone who puts on a mask and is only there for the money..
At the end of the day, what self worth is there if the only reason why I have someone by my side at my deathbed is because of the money which I am about to leave behind..

Just my 2 cents worth but sis I hope someday you'll meet your Mr Right too.. ^^

everytime i ask a single guy friend what kinda wife he want? he would say all the above n most impt gd character, compatible, presentable. then i say hey why don't u consider A, B n C? he would say no la A too fat, B too tall, C so flat chest n face so ugly. to a guy looks isv impt.

ask a gal friend the same she would say. then i say why dont she consider X, Y n Z? she would say no la X is too poor, Y is boring n no career prospect n Z is stingy n would never buy her an LV bag. to a gal financials is v impt

infatuation can start only aft these conditions are met 1st.

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by orangeproud

I believe true love does exist, but mostly in less developed countries or rural side, where poverty kick in, the couples will take care of each other even he/she is handicapped or terminal ill, even donate their own organ to save their loved ones.

I agree with the settings Sis..

That's why I think flaunting beauty/wealth only serves to lure unwanted attention.. It is only true when the other has nothing to gain yet chooses to stand true.

Originally Posted by orangeproud

In developed & modernized country like Spore, everything evolve with money, even pursue studies, we r taught to study hard to earn more money not how to be a good moral better man. We spend our lifetime pursuing higher status, more money. People become more self centre, believing money can buy everything including relationship. Love is conditional between couples in this society, even friendship is conditional, most will want to make friend with those same family background or superior family background rather with those less-privilege.

Trust me.. Even with money, it brings a lot of headaches.

Some examples..
"should i tell her the truth or pretend I am just another white-collar working class..?"
"but what if she knows and is there only for my money..?"
"would she leave if I pretended that all my businesses failed and I owe large amount of debts..?"
"should I sell my car and test her..?"
"but what if she is true and gets angry over what I did..?"

[dyelook]

Originally Posted by TheSeeker

Hi Sis,
Yay I got it right this time.. lol

comfirm 100% right?
if you survey orangeproud past post then maybe youll not think youre right this time..

[orangeproud]

Originally Posted by Edyta

everytime i ask a single guy friend what kinda wife he want? he would say all the above n most impt gd character, compatible, presentable. then i say hey why don't u consider A, B n C? he would say no la A too fat, B too tall, C so flat chest n face so ugly. to a guy looks isv impt.

ask a gal friend the same she would say. then i say why dont she consider X, Y n Z? she would say no la X is too poor, Y is boring n no career prospect n Z is stingy n would never buy her an LV bag. to a gal financials is v impt

infatuation can start only aft these conditions are met 1st.

Totally agree, raise my both hands & legs to agree. To a guy, they prefer gals with pretty face, good figures & at the same time has good characters. Is rare & difficult to find such a gem, so they compromise themselves choosing look over character then end up divorce, then they repeated the vicious cycle again & again.

For gals, they look for someone who is financial stronger background, athletic or fit, humorous, romantic, caring & loyal type.....but normally those family-oriented, loyal, faithful good husband type is those boring, serious, frugal type. Soon, they tired of this boring life, looking for more exciting world outside. So, is hard to have best of both world, but humans are greedy creatures, nvr content with what they have.

Anyway, nobody is perfect. If u are a perfectionist in marriage life, u will get disappointed.

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by Edyta

everytime i ask a single guy friend what kinda wife he want? he would say all the above n most impt gd character, compatible, presentable. then i say hey why don't u consider A, B n C? he would say no la A too fat, B too tall, C so flat chest n face so ugly. to a guy looks isv impt.

Hmm, I can't really comment on that..
Personally I like her to be feminine, pleasant and not overbearing, a little blur/silly.. Lol, I like to play the pampering and doting role.. It's just me..

As for the looks department, as long as she is presentable, that is what I mean by 顺眼.. has got nothing to do with her physique, cup size etc.. Lol, in fact I prefer her not to be too pretty..

Drop dead gorgeous babe attracts a lot of attention.. And with attention comes the competition..

Originally Posted by Edyta

ask a gal friend the same she would say. then i say why dont she consider X, Y n Z? she would say no la X is too poor, Y is boring n no career prospect n Z is stingy n would never buy her an LV bag. to a gal financials is v impt

infatuation can start only aft these conditions are met 1st.

Finances, society standings, careers does bring along security..
It makes sense that girls prioritize these as prerequisites.

Maybe it is just me but I dislike feeling like a piece of meat dangling in the market when people are poking and prodding me trying to assess if I make the cut..

From a guy's perspective, I think it is important to hold back and not reveal one's true net worth unless I think she is the right person because it helps to distinguish those who are suitable from the ones who are not..

[dyelook]

Originally Posted by orangeproud

Totally agree, raise my both hands & legs to agree. To a guy, they prefer gals with pretty face, good figures & at the same time has good characters. Is rare & difficult to find such a gem, so they compromise themselves choosing look over character then end up divorce, then they repeated the vicious cycle again & again.

For gals, they look for someone who is financial stronger background, athletic or fit, humorous, romantic, caring & loyal type.....but normally those family-oriented, loyal, faithful good husband type is those boring, serious, frugal type. Soon, they tired of this boring life, looking for more exciting world outside. So, is hard to have best of both world, but humans are greedy creatures, nvr content with what they have.

Anyway, nobody is perfect. If u are a perfectionist in marriage life, u will get disappointed.

blame it on the media...

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by dyelook

comfirm 100% right?
if you survey orangeproud past post then maybe youll not think youre right this time..

Lol Bro,

I thought orange says she is a girl on the other thread?

[dyelook]

Originally Posted by TheSeeker

Lol Bro,

I thought orange says she is a girl on the other thread?

if theres a normination.for the most blur samster of the year award then i'll surely norminate you...

[orangeproud]

Originally Posted by TheSeeker

I agree with the settings Sis..

That's why I think flaunting beauty/wealth only serves to lure unwanted attention.. It is only true when the other has nothing to gain yet chooses to stand true.



Trust me.. Even with money, it brings a lot of headaches.

Some examples..
"should i tell her the truth or pretend I am just another white-collar working class..?"
"but what if she knows and is there only for my money..?"
"would she leave if I pretended that all my businesses failed and I owe large amount of debts..?"
"should I sell my car and test her..?"
"but what if she is true and gets angry over what I did..?"

Of course, I believe & agree that money brings in more headache. If a love or relationship is built or based on monetary, it is definitely not true love, just a transaction, but guys sometimes are self deceiving creatures, psycho themselves although they know the gals love their wealth more than his person, psycho them the gals will one day touch by them & fall in love with them....blah.....etc.

[orangeproud]

Originally Posted by TheSeeker

Lol Bro,

I thought orange says she is a girl on the other thread?

If I say I'm not a gal, would u get disappointed?

Hee........just kidding, dun mind pls.

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by orangeproud

Totally agree, raise my both hands & legs to agree. To a guy, they prefer gals with pretty face, good figures & at the same time has good characters. Is rare & difficult to find such a gem, so they compromise themselves choosing look over character then end up divorce, then they repeated the vicious cycle again & again.

Hmm, hi sis/bro..

I don't know if you will agree with this but a pretty face fades away and a good figure sags with time.. Beauty is not only skin deep but it is also temporary..

Because I accept this as an undeniable fact, therefore in my opinion looks is not of the utmost importance..

Originally Posted by orangeproud

For gals, they look for someone who is financial stronger background, athletic or fit, humorous, romantic, caring & loyal type.....but normally those family-oriented, loyal, faithful good husband type is those boring, serious, frugal type. Soon, they tired of this boring life, looking for more exciting world outside. So, is hard to have best of both world, but humans are greedy creatures, nvr content with what they have.

Anyway, nobody is perfect. If u are a perfectionist in marriage life, u will get disappointed.

Well said.. That's the competition which I dread the most..

For example if a guy have a few millions in savings, a steady job, owns side businesses, a luxury car and his own place but she meets someone who has 10 times of what the guy is worth.. Imagine that kind of temptation..

Regardless of how well-off one is, there is plenty of others who are financially stronger.. So gold diggers are definitely out..

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by dyelook

if theres a normination.for the most blur samster of the year award then i'll surely norminate you...

LOL! thank you ah bro!

Different mah, I never go look, see others profile mah..

Originally Posted by orangeproud

If I say I'm not a gal, would u get disappointed?

Hee........just kidding, dun mind pls.

Nope, why would I be disappointed..

Lol, it doesn't matter to me if you are a bro or a sis..
I am glad just to be friends.. ^^

By the way, I really enjoy the views exchange.. helps me to see things from different perspectives.. ^^

[korean]

My definition of true love not necessary to be eternity. If you truly love a person, you would want him or her to be happy, so it not necessary for him or her to be with you forever. To me true love should not be selfish. I guess it maybe debatable whether true love should be selfish or not.

Parent love is conditional. You want your children to be nice to you and listen to you yeah? Then it is conditional. If your children don't love you n and wanna eat up all your property n money n you still love him or her, then I would say it is unconditional.

I guess almost anything is conditional in this world...

[TheSeeker]

Originally Posted by korean

My definition of true love not necessary to be eternity. If you truly love a person, you would want him or her to be happy, so it not necessary for him or her to be with you forever. To me true love should not be selfish. I guess it maybe debatable whether true love should be selfish or not.

Interesting... I didn't think there would be a bro/sis who thinks the same way..

Many years ago, I used to feel the same way towards someone..

For a long time, it didn't matter to me that she was someone else's..
Just as long as she is happy..

14 years after, the love I once had for her no longer feels the same..
Yes, I still do hope she is happy but the way I felt for her is no longer there..

Had I really loved her? I would like to think so.. but I do not know for sure..