Paranoid: sbf male fb?

[I.m.Jim]

Originally Posted by westendgirl

Bro totally, we had met up and upz, if u get my drift. i have no issue if he just want to chat and not meet up.

TS, please note the below and it only applies to FB relationships.

In SBF, majority of the guys are married or attached. Many fear being recognized and exposure.

He is insecure about you meeting more samsters. FBs are hard to find, and he is afraid you will find someone more to your own liking and dump him.

Third, which was mentioned and I agree that theres a possibility. He might be a lao jiao under false pretense.

Did you do RAW with him, if so once a man tasted the golden fruit. He wants it all for himself, he will become very obsessed.

FBs should not control each other unless the relationship is ready for another step forward. If he don't want to meet others fine, but he has no right to forbid you to. UNLESS you are his rightful GF!

Correct his mindset of what FBs are all about please.

[BLseven]

actually to me as a fair minded libra, relationship with female other then your official wife is simple : only ask and demand in equal amount what you are prepared and able to give to others!

eg: if you can only meet certain amount of time in a week, then cannot ask that others days your girl cannot go out on her own with her friends. if you are not financially able to totally provide for the girl's monthly luxury expenses, then you have no right to even stop her from earning thru whatever means possible for her like ktv or fl.
and if i can't promise to marry the girl, i must be ready for the day when she will leave when she found somebody who's good to her and can marry her.

that's how i had conducted my fb/lover affairs for the past 10years with all happy endings, lucky me

in relation to you case sis, it's his right not to want to join in gatherings of yours with others but its also your right to want to have outings with them. every relationship have ironing to be done for a deeper understanding one la, even in fb and lovers and whatever, unless its very commercial base like sugar daddy arrangement.

wish you have happiness with whomever u meet and chose

[westendgirl]

Originally Posted by SexyStan

Chill gal... as someone neutral, I believe u've misunderstood Bro Littlepok's intended message. He's criticizing ur Man, not u. Hope that clarifies. As for ur Man's fears, becoz of some lack of info we have here from u (u may also b lacking some info on ur part as well for that matter, we really don't knw...), there can b multiple perspectives & his paranoia or indignance may be due to one or a few of the below listed reasons: -

(i) In Biz, Speak Biz (在商言商)

U've mentioned he is a bizman. In biz, reputation does matter. He cld b fearing tt a Samster outing wld unnecessarily blow his identity, &/or even cause him to bump into fellow Samsters w/ he has biz dealings w/. It may seem a small matter to u, or us even; But it may generate unnecessary awkwardness in future when he's talking biz in a professional capacity, jeopardize biz r/s, or even generate unnecessary rumors about him in his inner circle.

(ii) His marital status or other circumstances

Particularly for bizmen &/or some1 w/ reasonable public exposure, & in furtherance of e above (i), e anonymity that e virtual world offers to all of us protects them slightly more. Using marriage as an example, he might have fears that he loses his bargaining power becoz he's identity might be blown to a samster who is also a biz associate, simply becoz now e same associate, having known who he is, & perhaps what he does becoz of FRs or stories he's published, blackmails him. It may seem a remote fear, but remote as it is, it can happen bcoz e world of biz is a cut throat one. I do not knw e size of e biz he has, or e industry he's in, but I believe tt fear wld b there, e difference being only in e propensity he feels it.

(iii) R/s between e 2 of u

U mentioned him as a FB. Perhaps he does not see u in tt light. It cld b his possessiveness, not wanting to share u w/ fellow samsters, regardless of his seniority in this forum, or he knws what goes on in these forums & he cannot bear e thought of that happening to u &/or him. Perhaps, he hates how some shallow guys (most in fact but certainly not all), is likely to see u in a light whereby u "can b upped" (blunt, but some cruel truths, no harm intended) if people knew he had his chance w/ u. Perhaps, such a thought is simply too much for him to bear; and/or

(iv) Simply doesn't care

Not that he doesn't care about u. But he simply doesn't care about a Samster meeting. Some of us keep to ourselves pretty much (me included and I haven't met that many samsters before really in the past). Particularly for males, especially those w/ a profile in biz, we tend to be very objective-driven. A mere outing like food and drinks, could be mistakebly perceived as a waste of time w/o much specific outcomes, by some men.

Just some thoughts I have. I hope my perspective helps, but I do understand its not meant to be exhaustive towards other possibilities. If u r truly feeling curious & perturbed, I believe u shld speak to him. After all, if u guys are intimate, what's there that cannot b spoken aboveboard? U've credited him for being attentive, I'm sure he'd b more than willing to offer u answers like how a gentleman wld instead of have u (or us) speculate.

bro ur post is so inclusive and profound, it clicks with me. so much so, i actually shed a tear for the predicament that he maybe in but would not let me in lest it hurts me. Some of your points were mentioned before by him.

u r right, he is very objective and cool. sometimes cold even. He wont go out for a casual drink, even his own kakis as frequently as they wanted him to. His limited social circle is not limited to samsters alone.

He also warned of the stigma of association with SBF and i think he wanted to protect me. He may have a history. Probably need to clarify with him further on this point.

He is a nice guy but sometimes just too bloody calm. I am actually pleasantly surprise when he agreed to allow me to put up this thread and throw our "problem" into the open. Hopefully after this, some spark will fly...

Bro Stan, u r wise and appreciate your efforts to share.

[BoinKING]

Originally Posted by aceaceguy

Haha, good one bro.

Is ur trade mark 'bishan'?

Haha.. "they" call me magic fingers..
And also natural sleeping pills.. after one therapy session they will have a good night sleep.

[westendgirl]

Originally Posted by BoinKING

then stick to one how to level up right?
haha must have a few to improve skill ma..

Everyone got their trade mark move.. which makes it fun.. hence FBs..

Originally Posted by aceaceguy

Haha, good one bro.

Is ur trade mark 'bishan'?

you guys are funny la. bro ace2guy, what is a "bishan"?

[mi.chi.eru]

Another scenario:

He could be having multiple nicks and afraid that he would be discovered.

Let's just say that there are the good the bad and the ugly when you meet up with people.

[westendgirl]

Originally Posted by I.m.Jim

TS, please note the below and it only applies to FB relationships.

In SBF, majority of the guys are married or attached. Many fear being recognized and exposure.

He is insecure about you meeting more samsters. FBs are hard to find, and he is afraid you will find someone more to your own liking and dump him.

Third, which was mentioned and I agree that theres a possibility. He might be a lao jiao under false pretense.

Did you do RAW with him, if so once a man tasted the golden fruit. He wants it all for himself, he will become very obsessed.

FBs should not control each other unless the relationship is ready for another step forward. If he don't want to meet others fine, but he has no right to forbid you to. UNLESS you are his rightful GF!

Correct his mindset of what FBs are all about please.

no raw la. we r grown up and responsible ppl.

Originally Posted by BLseven

actually to me as a fair minded libra, relationship with female other then your official wife is simple : only ask and demand in equal amount what you are prepared and able to give to others!

eg: if you can only meet certain amount of time in a week, then cannot ask that others days your girl cannot go out on her own with her friends. if you are not financially able to totally provide for the girl's monthly luxury expenses, then you have no right to even stop her from earning thru whatever means possible for her like ktv or fl.
and if i can't promise to marry the girl, i must be ready for the day when she will leave when she found somebody who's good to her and can marry her.

that's how i had conducted my fb/lover affairs for the past 10years with all happy endings, lucky me

in relation to you case sis, it's his right not to want to join in gatherings of yours with others but its also your right to want to have outings with them. every relationship have ironing to be done for a deeper understanding one la, even in fb and lovers and whatever, unless its very commercial base like sugar daddy arrangement.

wish you have happiness with whomever u meet and chose

thanks for the sincere wishes. u r rite, guess gathering and clubbing is not everyone's cup of tea. will remember that.

Originally Posted by mi.chi.eru

Another scenario:

He could be having multiple nicks and afraid that he would be discovered.

Let's just say that there are the good the bad and the ugly when you meet up with people.

this point is new. but dont think he will reveal his other identities or nicks. i can respect that, no issue...

[mi.chi.eru]

Just to side track a little.. This chap who used to go out with a group of us ended up borrowing money from each of us. Long story short, we found out after a while he had multiple nicks and was doing the same to others.

In all fairness he could be scared shit of being discovered, meeting familiar people or there could be 101 theories, conspiracies or what have you.

As long as everyone is getting what they want, why bother?

[IwasApo]

Actually there is nothing wrong not to meet up with people.
You r here to hunt, get a fb / fl /whatever, y complicate matters with non essential meetups that benefit nobody.

Of cos it gets a little sticky when he restricts your movement.

Some people are just plain rubbish and you dun want your girl to be associated with rubbish.

Of cos this presents a problem. The girl can accept it or the girl can tell you to fuck off. That is entirely the girl's choice. There will be girls who disassociate themself successful, and you scold the guy when he talk about sbf and there are girls who don't. It all depend on the guy and you. I'll keep the one that listens to me.

One way to go around it, is to introduce a few of these people into his circle of trust, and this are the allowed people to mingle with. He doesn't need to know them well or be buddy with them, just so the communication and space still exists.

[acidicavex]

Originally Posted by westendgirl

i think he is naive if looking for exclusivity here and trying to protect his territory. he is reading this and i hope he see his folly if that's his intention.


p/s
bro onlyhuman,
can i get into your little list below?

Well sis I won't say he is naive someone I know did try to change the whole meaning of FB by try to be exclusive.

There are bound to have ppl who try to redefine the term of FB.

To me is you want to be exclusive mean

For both female n male mean cut screwing or dating others strictly reserve your time for that exclusive someone.


But if you still want to lead a normal life and dates and see others than best don't go commit yourself to be exclusive it will very well end up in some shitty situation.

[DYBJ]

I was invited to this thread via PM by a good bro of mine to share my tots n view on this.
WEG short for westendgirl k , there are no restrictions on u making friends in this forum going for meetups orgies drinking sessions bbqs getting pissed drunked getting willing groped etc etc etc but but but..............this is only applicable if u 2 r purely on a pure FB relationship!

If situation is tat he is not just plainly a FB, then the boundaries hv changed.
Ur responsibilities twds him hv also changed.

Meeting people here from this forum is not a bad thing, wats wrong wif increasing ur social network ya?
But, if one is in this forum long enuff, he/she will know, some r just wolves in sheeps clothing.
In this lite, unless u r not wise or street smart enuff, n give everyone a benefit of a doubt until u r bitten by them, be it in reality, or spammed in this forum which happens ever so often, wif lies converted to truth, then it is a warranted case to worry.

One who values his privacy does not equate to him being anti-social, it's just that they do not want to pollute their space with unnecessary n unwanted pollution.
Some people r very picky to making friends some are anything goes, where the 1st one has less friends but also, less probs n the latter has more friends but has more headaches n more chances of being involved in gossips n slander.

So, being a businessman, yes, i can see where he is coming from, of cos, he is worried about his privacy, but if u r in his inner circle, then of cos he is worried abt urs too for losing urs will inadvertently lead to him losing his.
See the connection now?

So, my conclusion is, as per my thread:
http://samleong.shop/showthread.php?t=305967
Is to know where the boundaries lie n where the lines of responsibility lie n whether his intentions r warranted or whether ur thread is warranted in the 1st place.

[pussyslime8]

There's no innocent girls here , you know

[aceaceguy]

Originally Posted by BoinKING

Haha.. "they" call me magic fingers..
And also natural sleeping pills.. after one therapy session they will have a good night sleep.

Is it?

If I were u, I would prefer to be called 'wonder dick'!

[aceaceguy]

Originally Posted by westendgirl

you guys are funny la. bro ace2guy, what is a "bishan"?

The bishan taxi stand he conquered in the fucking in public thread.

Maybe sis can try bishan bus stop next?

[BoinKING]

Originally Posted by aceaceguy

Is it?

If I were u, I would prefer to be called 'wonder dick'!

He he fingers more versatile la..
Can use in places where the 2ic cannot come out and still gets the job done...

Of course knowing how to combo and stack the different orgasm together can be a killer combo