Shanghai Nostalgia

[Faidenk]

CHAPTER 16

We made love again that night, with no less intensity. This time her vocals went up several notches and I had to glue my lips to hers to try soften her cries. The walls are thin and the still night amplified our grunts and moans. We laid there breathless and completely spent, unable to talk and drifted off.

I woke up, the condom still wrapped around my lifeless dick, my senses tingling and head clear, as though waking up from 12 hours of deep sleep. I turned to look at her, she was all curled up. I covered her with the comforter, she looked cold, propped my pillow against the headrest and sat up against it.

I felt a tinge of regret. I should not have seduced her. With streetwalkers or KTV girls, money is the median in which the transactions are sealed. Sex is exchanged for money, emotions does not come into play. Each knows his/her role and place. That is the theory. Even then, judging from the many ‘Falling in love with WLs, FLs, bargirls’ stories, infringements are not unknown. What more us? I stared out into space.

Have I opened an emotional Pandora Box? I like to think I am a rational person. Age and the many tests of life serve as a firewall that stops me waddling deeper into quicksand I can’t get out of. Such relationships more often than not come to grief and I know steps must be taken before it got out of hand.

Xiao Qing has no such defense mechanism. She is young and contrary to what she said, much too idealistic and naïve. True, she possesses of a quiet maturity and quick intelligence but it is far from adequate without having experienced the hard knocks that life dishes out. Much like a parent who wished he could take the place of a sick child, I realized she has to tread the path alone. I can only try help cushion against onset of cynicism and emotional baggage and hope she emerge from this unscathed. And it saddens me.

[Faidenk]

CHAPTER 17

I thought about how to lighten her hurt when, not if, it comes. For both our sanities it has to come sooner than later. A part of me says you are on to a good thing; good sex, the holiest of grail the so-called GFE, low maintenance, isn’t something that comes along every other day. The other part of me, the ‘good man’, says you are setting her up for a fall, can you live with that? But if it’s not me, it’ll be someone else, and, at least I’ll try to cushion the landing. And the battle goes on.

She woke up to see me staring into space. The morning light crept slowly into the room. I hadn’t expected her to wake. ‘What are you thinking of?’ She must have been observing me for a while.

‘I am thinking’ I said quietly, ‘that I should not have bed you. I don’t see this relationship going anywhere and it can only bring hurt to you’.

A long silence. I was afraid she would cry. ‘I told you I’m not some naïve village girl. This is my decision so don’t look too deep into this’.

‘You are sure about this?’

‘Yes. Why don’t we enjoy the time we have together and when it’s time, well, at least we have some good memories. I have no illusions whatever. You know, it gets a little lonely for me too. I don’t have any close friends other than colleagues, I spent all my time working, trying to upgrade myself. I volunteer to work on off-days, both for the pay as well as to pass the time. I like you, you are kind and I don’t feel being made use of’.

She paused, ‘So, don’t try to be my father’.

I had to laugh at that. She did too. And that brought the subject to a close. ‘Let’s think of something fun to do today’.

And that somewhat put my apprehensions aside and it got me thinking what fun can there possibly be better than another roll on the bed.

[5stars]

Yo Faidenk,

Great writing!!

Patiently reading your first 3 chapters, and it just keeps my eyes glued to your stories.

I know how to spend my evening - to complete your thread before I go to bed

Up your points later

[jur9]

Bloody brillant writing. Wicked!

By the way bro, your nick means red light?

Every man's dream.... GFE without the guilt feeling..... you go man!

[Ronaldo]

Originally Posted by Faidenk

‘You know, I like you the moment I saw you’, I said, ‘enough to make me go back 3 times, and even more times if you did not, errr, bumped into me. I really shouldn’t be doing this. I have a family back home and am not going to leave them or anything like that. I wasn’t planning to talk to you or anything that day, just acting out my fantasy, but I’m like a moth attracted to the flame. I would not be able to offer you anything other friendship and companionship’.

She sighed, ‘Good men are always taken’. A long pause. ‘But I’m not naïve and it is wishful thinking for me to expect anything otherwise’, she looked up staring at the floor, ‘but I’m also like a moth’.

OMG... You invaded Shanghai after Panyu ah? Hahaha.. I am going back to Shanghai after the CNY. And yes I hang out around Pudong and could almost see myself virtually there in your story.

But in the later posts, you mentioned that you are back in SG. Same here.
Are you still in the same line?

Anyway, the above statements are always good to use. I dont think you are much of Banana if you can carry that off in perfect Chinese.

See ya!

[Faidenk]

Originally Posted by Ronaldo

OMG... You invaded Shanghai after Panyu ah? Hahaha.. I am going back to Shanghai after the CNY. And yes I hang out around Pudong and could almost see myself virtually there in your story.

But in the later posts, you mentioned that you are back in SG. Same here.
Are you still in the same line?

Anyway, the above statements are always good to use. I dont think you are much of Banana if you can carry that off in perfect Chinese.

See ya!

Yo bro,
A correction, Panyu was during and after Shanghai. Stayed at R's company house which was empty most times, then spent another 6 months or so in Shenzhen, bunking in at a buddy's apartment.

This series is just what the title suggests, nostalgia.

Although I can carry out a decent conversation in Chinese, I can't read all that well, maybe around 200 common words, just to illustrate, I have problems reading Chinese menus. This'll give you an idea.

[Faidenk]

Originally Posted by jur9

Bloody brillant writing. Wicked!

By the way bro, your nick means red light?

Every man's dream.... GFE without the guilt feeling..... you go man!

Yes, it means that, which is the Thai slang for 'that time of the month', which is my way to tell the girls politely to shoo off when I used to frequent Thailand. A face-saving way of getting rejected and always a laugh out of them. After a while, these girls called me that and it stuck.

[Faidenk]

CHAPTER 18

Due to the hectic pace at the store, we did not get to meet save for a brief sandwich lunch at short distance from her workplace. I had bought the ingredients for the sandwich from a downtown Puxi supermarket at the Jingan Temple station. I like coming here more for the expat housewives than for the imported stuff they stocked. It’s easy to strike up conversations with the Japanese and Korean housewives although I did not once got lucky.

I had taken the opportunity to get the Chinese-made parma ham to bring home where it will be much appreciated by my foodies family and friends. I had it once in a Szechuan restaurant, they called it ‘xiang rou’ fragrant meat, served thinly sliced and garnished with chilli and Szechuan hot peppers, absolutely delicious. I’m sure it goes well wrapped round a beef roast or anything for that matter. Expeditions to several supermarts proved futile, even the one at Shanghai No. 1 Store. I keep looking…

I had stuffed the hamburger buns with mayo, some more sesame seeds, rough-grated black peppercorn, lettuce, sliced hardboiled eggs, Hungarian salami and thinly sliced steamed chicken breasts I made and topped with coriander. It’s refreshing and a welcome change from the oily Shanghainese fares. She loved it, although I had doubt how she would like the salami.

The sun was out although the wind’s getting a little chilly at times. She took a small polite bite, and was surprised that it actually tasted good and remarked so. After we finished, I told her I am going back home for an office meeting and will spend a week or so away, and what presents would she like? I had in mind a packet of the BBQ sweet meat and perhaps a bottle of perfume from the airport because one can buy anything in China and cheaper. Bring yourself back, it’s all I want, and held my hand. Perfume and BBQ meat it is then.

‘Would you pick me up later this evening?’ Would I? A firing squad wouldn’t keep me away. It’s been a week since and I’m randy as hell. The holiday mood had wind down and it’s back to normal pace of life, although all modes of transportation were still fully booked by those returning from homes in other provinces and overseas holidays.

Today at this busy junction I don’t see the pickpockets at work, they must be resting after a productive period or they could have been arrested. The pickpockets here are predominantly from Xinjiang. Their facial features made them more at home in Afghanistan than China. Other than pickpocketing, restauranting and pushing ganja seems to be their 2 other occupations. A Xinjiang restaurant round the corner from my place serves pretty good and inexpensive fares. M French neighbor asked me to ask the owner where we could get some ‘da ma’ ganja and were told to come back the next day. We did and a shifty looking guy turned up. If I were to cast a role of a drug pusher in a film, he would be the perfect choice. RMB100 for about a pinkie finger-sized lump in a plastic lockbag, no seeds and no stalks, we ended up with 4. The stuff’s weak compared to what I had all those years ago. Anyway after a couple of times I refrained from it because I didn’t want to pick up smoking (cigarettes) again.

Today I had a hankering for some, called the Frenchie, and yes, he had a fresh supply and com’on over to get some. So after the lunch with Xiao Qing, walked back to knock on Frenchie’s door. A fresh joint was already waiting for me, and Frenchie had a silly grin on his face. His live-in had gone to work and won’t be back until the evening. I lit it up and pulled 2 deep ones and handed it back to him. He was busy rolling another and insisted I have it all ‘to catch up’. The haze came before I finished the joint. I went to the kitchen to pour 2 glasses of the nice Chianti he kept in the fridge. I refused the next joint, contented with the buzz and sipped my Chianti.

Frenchie had lived years in Cuba importing frozen chickens to the expat community there until his Cuban partner did a Chinese takeover and left him out on the streets. He had a fiery temper, flared up as quickly as he cooled and sometimes I wonder how I ever put up with him, but I did. I had met him when still a newbie at a bar and he had shown me his apartment which he paid a princely sum of RMB7,000 in rent. I got mine later for about half that. He justified the amount by the floor heating, better furniture and a Bose system. I know when to keep my trap shut but reckoned he could have got away with maybe RMB5,000. Anyway, when in periods of pussy droughts, we hang out together in ‘local’ discos and as well as other places of questionable repute.

[Ronaldo]

Originally Posted by Faidenk

Yo bro,
A correction, Panyu was during and after Shanghai. Stayed at R's company house which was empty most times, then spent another 6 months or so in Shenzhen, bunking in at a buddy's apartment.

Ahhh.. I understand now.. I remembered you being in Shanghai then. Well I will be back in China after the CNY. So if you do come by, drop me a PM...

Have fun...

[sindroid]

I'm really enjoying this story...it's so great with detail and love!

[Reaper]

You have to one of the best, if not THE best writers here in this forum. Very refreshing and stimulating (mentally and otherwise) to read....

you sound like a Casanova with a conscience