[parrotkid]

Originally Posted by xiaosiami

The point is never about marrying the woman for sex. The point has always been why the stark difference in attitude towards sex before and after marriage and for some before and after child birth.

Is it because before marriage it is a forbidden fruit and so it is more exciting and thus the willingness to have sex?

Or sex becames a duty as part of your marital responsibilities after marriage that's why it lost its appeal?

Or it is because after marriage, you get the 'license' to have sex with fear of moral repurcussions and that's why the eagerness to have sex?

Or is it that after giving birth, you have fulfilled your marital obligations in ensuring that the husband's blood line is continued and thus factory close shop?

To sarahxx,

Resentment - So the punishment is less sex? So giving less sex can actually make the husband 'wake up his bloody idea' and start making the wife more emotionally fulfilled?

Edit: Make a choice...do you want to reinforce bad behaviour or do you want to reinforce good behaviour?

There is a hokkien saying that says " If the cow doesn't want to drink, it won't drink even if you bring it to the river." So how does this saying applies in this context?

Simple. It is your effort that matters, not his! It is up to you whether you want to feel emotionally secure or not. It's up to you whether you want to enjoy the sex or not. If you are already predisposed not to enjoy, nothing he does matters.

There are plenty of worries in the world but can they be solved immediately by not having sex? Don't let what you can do, stop you from doing what you still can do.

Whether you have sex or not, there are worries to worry about, there are unreasonable bosses to deal with, there are bills to pay and there are wailing babies to take care off right?

So why not have sex and enjoy the moment then? At least during that moment, you forget about your troubles. And if not having sex leads to more problems, isn't it then stupid not to have sex?

Totally agreed.