Puzzled

[Nanonited]

Good afternoon to all bros,

i know this isn't exactly a love forum but would love to get some input from here also.

My ex-gf recently broke up with me due to "differences". Anyway i know it's most prob due to this new guy she went clubbing together in a grp the week before she break up. We together arnd 3 yrs.

The biggest question i hope someone can give me insight is... why she keep denying that the guy is the reason or not the main reason. This is despite the fact i recently saw some "close" photos of them. I already more or less move on but just bui gam wan this fact only la.. which is why must lie and deny.. even now after some time has passed. When she wanted to break up, i already know most prob cause of the guy and i told her if it's because of him and he more suitable, good luck.. but she deny that's the main reason.

Even after she want to break i also nv show signs of hate or bui songness.. just wish her all the best.. she want to go i also lan lan. i didn't ctc her since breakup until recently i saw those photos.. just wanted to cfm with her only.

Since the day we broke up, she blocked my acc from seeing the photos she's tagged in and even these recent photos, after i congratulated her on a new relationship, she ask her friend to remove from the album ( i think, cause the photos disappeared frm the album). We didn't part on a bad note, no fight nothing.

Any bros came across similar stuff before? Gam xia.. gam xia

[afx2222]

"Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help"

I do believe you read the above quote

Good day TS. Hope you have a piece of mind. However, you did mention your gf still favor the clubbing scene. It seems like both of you could be having age gap or your are too young for her and she's too old for your vice versa.

Did you notice that most of the troubled and puzzled individual who shared their life's ups and downs are mostly encountering with a FL, WL, ML, GRO or any woman in the flesh trade.

Maybe our boss can enlighten you

[hommedoux]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

Good afternoon to all bros,

The biggest question i hope someone can give me insight is... why she keep denying that the guy is the reason or not the main reason. This is despite the fact i recently saw some "close" photos of them. I already more or less move on but just bui gam wan this fact only la.. which is why must lie and deny.. even now after some time has passed. When she wanted to break up, i already know most prob cause of the guy and i told her if it's because of him and he more suitable, good luck.. but she deny that's the main reason.

Sometimes, when we break off with someone, we will evade the most obvious answer and cited other reasons which might be insignificant to all. Especially when we started to have romantic feelings for another person. Reasons varies but one of the reasons which I can think of is to minimize the hurt caused.

Just imagine if she was to tell you that she started having feelings for someone else right in your face. How would you have take it or feel? If you were to put yourself in her shoes, would you tell her that you started developing feelings for another girl and you wanted to break off with her?

For what is worth, the relationship between you two has comes to an end. Move on and find a greener pasture. There will always be someone else for you. Harbouring the thoughts to resonate yourself on why she left you will not change the fact that she's gone now.

Just a newbie's opinion. :-)

[goodpartner]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

Any bros came across similar stuff before? Gam xia.. gam xia

This buay-guan-waness is a common feeling for the one being betrayed la. The reason for denying it or not saying the real reason (even it if's obvious) is either to save face or not to hurt the other party.

Say for example you're on the other side of the fence, would you deny too? If saving face is the reason, that means the other party is not important to you anymore; your ego weighs more.

If your intention is not to hurt with the truth, you can't tell the other party this right?

So now you're on this side of the fence, which of the above is true?

WHY do you want her to own up even though you knew the real reason already? Izit so that you'll feel better that you're right?

[Olduncle]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

Good afternoon to all bros,

My ex-gf recently broke up with me due to "differences". We together arnd 3 yrs.
The biggest question i hope someone can give me insight is... why she keep denying that the guy is the reason or not the main reason.

let uncle tell you ur gf seems to be a very caring person and she stills care a little for you uncle tink she deny is becoz she does not want to hurt ur male pride and ego !! uncle very sad you lost her. just move on .......

[manenuf]

Hi bro,

Was in the same situation as u were a few years ago. In my opinion is that once a gal change her mind (n heart), there is nothing u can do to reverse it. I didn't bother to ask her then but, like u did, wish her all the best!!

[alan0338]

already happen liao, just forget it la, why would u wanna know when things cant be changed

[sammyboyfor]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

My ex-gf recently broke up with me due to "differences". Anyway i know it's most prob due to this new guy she went clubbing together in a grp the week before she break up. We together arnd 3 yrs.

The biggest question i hope someone can give me insight is... why she keep denying that the guy is the reason or not the main reason.

1) Avoid girls who go "clubbing". Choose those who lead simple lives and shun decadent behaviour.

2) She's simply saying "fuck off" in a polite manner.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

Good afternoon to all bros,

i know this isn't exactly a love forum but would love to get some input from here also.

My ex-gf recently broke up with me due to "differences". Anyway i know it's most prob due to this new guy she went clubbing together in a grp the week before she break up. We together arnd 3 yrs.

The biggest question i hope someone can give me insight is... why she keep denying that the guy is the reason or not the main reason. This is despite the fact i recently saw some "close" photos of them. I already more or less move on but just bui gam wan this fact only la.. which is why must lie and deny.. even now after some time has passed. When she wanted to break up, i already know most prob cause of the guy and i told her if it's because of him and he more suitable, good luck.. but she deny that's the main reason.

Even after she want to break i also nv show signs of hate or bui songness.. just wish her all the best.. she want to go i also lan lan. i didn't ctc her since breakup until recently i saw those photos.. just wanted to cfm with her only.

Since the day we broke up, she blocked my acc from seeing the photos she's tagged in and even these recent photos, after i congratulated her on a new relationship, she ask her friend to remove from the album ( i think, cause the photos disappeared frm the album). We didn't part on a bad note, no fight nothing.

Any bros came across similar stuff before? Gam xia.. gam xia

So wat if she told you she dumped you so she could go wif the other guy?
Does that make you more gum wan or lagi buay gum wan?
Think about this for a second.
Also, since you already know beyond a benefit of a doubt what she left you for, you actually already got the closure you seek plus you saw a side of her that is PRICELESS!

Learn the diff between wat kind of GF is for wat.
Those guai guai hardly ever cheong or clubbing or party type, this type of GF must keep & prolly even marry.
Those GF that like clubbing, fucking every or anywhere, cheong, get high, go chalet even must lim jiu till high high, this type can put tor sio poo that's about all.
Expect more from these, any you'll be in for a roller coaster ride.
These are the exact type that will upgrade to become WLs or baoyees in their later years

[Nanonited]

Thanks bros for the replies. I now know that clubbing girls not suitable for me also. I thought can make it work... but i guess her true nature came through in the end

I'm sure i've learnt alot from this lesson.. and good luck to her new guy also.. hopefully they can make it work.

Bo bian.. no warning, just out of nowhere.. BAM.. kena lo. So still in shock i think even after some time. Just need to move on.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

Thanks bros for the replies. I now know that clubbing girls not suitable for me also. I thought can make it work... but i guess her true nature came through in the end

I'm sure i've learnt alot from this lesson.. and good luck to her new guy also.. hopefully they can make it work.

Bo bian.. no warning, just out of nowhere.. BAM.. kena lo. So still in shock i think even after some time. Just need to move on.

Like what my mom told me many many donkey years ago:
Boy, at who's expense are your suffering at?
Here you are sobbing away everyday while she's out there partying and having a boll of a time.
Same applies bro, dun hold on to things that are not existent anymore, time to hold on to things that are realistic

[Nanonited]

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

Like what my mom told me many many donkey years ago:
Boy, at who's expense are your suffering at?
Here you are sobbing away everyday while she's out there partying and having a boll of a time.
Same applies bro, dun hold on to things that are not existent anymore, time to hold on to things that are realistic

thanks Bro Do_You_BJ... i am not sobbing but i can't fully get this incident out of my mind yet. Am working towards that goal and hopefully will be a happier man soon.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Originally Posted by Nanonited

thanks Bro Do_You_BJ... i am not sobbing but i can't fully get this incident out of my mind yet. Am working towards that goal and hopefully will be a happier man soon.

All you need is time.
If someone told you time heals all wounds, he's an idiot.
Time helps you get used to the pain till it becomes so much a part of you that you're just numb to it already.
Take care bro....go live life.....many many more years ahead!

[NewMike1304k]

Hi TS,

I do not think you have really moved on. It doesn't matter what her reason is for leaving. Whether she admits that it is the new guy or what. She does not want to admit it because in doing so, she may feel she is guilty of being a slut or loose woman. So whatever her reason she has for not admitting it, does it really make any difference?

What is broken cannot be made back to the same, if she breaks it, then forget it and move on. Do not even bother if it is the guy she partied with x days ago or with her next door neighbour or what. It may feel buey song that you have invested the time and effort and maybe money. But in the end, if it were not to be, then it will never be. Show her you are a man, don even bother to talk to her or wander what she is up to. Just move on completely.

Many years ago I also kenna such a thing. In the beginning really buey song, really steaming... self doubt, hate and so on. Wandering who is is going out with and so on... But then I ask myself, is she worth all this? Why am I wasting my time? You want... you come... you don't want... then don't waste my time... I have my life to lead, which I wanted to lead with you, but now since you don't want, I will just find someone else who is more worthy... And my friend, I can tell you, it is difficult to do it, but once you are able to, it is easier on your own life.

Good luck.

[Nanonited]

Thank you Mike!! Yes.. When I say I have moved on mostly.. I mean that I am still partially still stuck in this vortex!! But you guys are all right.. I know what I need to know and I also know that there is no pt to thinking abt all this

I will try harder to move on and be a happier person